Southern Hat-titude

Eight things about me

2007-06-10T16:17:00.000-07:00

As a part of a tag-team game, I am supposed to list eight unique things about myself…oh, only eight?!

1. I am from a town with a state mental institution on the main drag. This fact used to horrify me. Now, my novels are set in the same town.

2. My skull has a divot. It is solid; not like my brain will ooze out. It is just not smooth and rounded. I was quite the rage in my college anatomy classes. I’ve always maintained that my brain was so huge; it caused my skull to become malformed.

3. I can do a killer chicken imitation. When I graduated from high school, my classmates made me cackle during the ceremony. They threatened to tie me to my chair if I didn’t.

4. I have deep twin dimples; one of the reasons I like to smile so often.

5. When I was a child, I had an imaginary friend who lived in a skate.

6. I loved cats so much when I was little (still do), I would crawl under houses, cars, or anyplace to play with one. I tamed more than one wild kitten, too.

7. I love to fish, but I don’t like to either touch the bait or the fish. As long as someone is sucker enough to do these tasks for me, I will fish until the cows come home.

8. I love animals, but horses seem to know I fear them. They take one look at me and scrub me off on the nearest tree on the way home to the barn. Cowgirl, I am not.

I have more, of course…

Madhatter

Tired of the cholesterol issue? Me, too.

2007-01-03T13:51:00.000-08:00

I have to be the stupidest human on earth. I had my annual check-up with blood work around the holidays. Is it a surprise that my cholesterol is high? um...no. Did I eat everything bad in sight? Um...yes.

Good thing I can write. Seems I have a problem with eating; at least, correctly.

What if...

one day, the medical community discovers that elevated cholesterol levels are some kind of protective device? Will we all be encouraged to eat a cheeseburger and biggie fries each day?

Gee...hope I live to see the day...

Being neurotic helps...

2006-11-17T18:49:00.000-08:00

I hit the 30 K mark in the NaNo competiton today. Only 20,000 more words to go!

I find it helps to have an unnerving day. I came home and dashed off a cool three thousand in a flash. Love it.

Must say, this quick way of getting words on paper is fun. My internal editor is so fed-up with me, she may never come back from Tahiti.

Good riddance, perhaps?

Trying something new!

2006-09-10T18:01:00.000-07:00

To jumpstart my next novel, I am signing up for NaNo, the national novel writing contest. The object is to write a 50,000 word novel in the month of November. A number of my writer buddies are doing it, too. Should be fun.

My novels are usually longer -- from 80,000 to 90,000 words. I may not complete the first draft in the time allowed, but I can give it a heck of a try.

The hard part will be turning off my internal editor. To get this many words down on paper, I can not stop to tweat and toil along the way.

I have already started to work on some character sheets -- outlines of characters in the book. By the time I start to write, they will seem like flesh and blood. I suppose that's the point.

How funny is that!!??

2006-08-29T12:58:00.000-07:00

Prompted by an email from a friend, I googled my name plus the word "needs". One of the results led me to a blog from another female with my first name, from the south. This is odd because I have an unusual first name and have met no other females who share it. Her cat even resembled mine! How bizzare is life?

Also, she is a Clemson fan and I am an FSU Seminole. I was impressed with Clemson fans when we visited their stadium for a game a few years back.

So, here's to synchronicity, or whatever the heck...

Hey, I have cat eyes!

2006-08-22T18:09:00.000-07:00

I just had my yearly eye exam. Not nearly as much fun as a physical, but more interesting. My pupils are still dialated! Nothing like stepping out into the glaring Florida midday sun and groping my way to the car. Even with dark sunglasses, I had to squint to see the road. I spent the entire trip home hoping I wouldn't do anything stupid and get pulled over. One look at my eyes and I might have been mistaken for someone who, as one of my friends puts it, was "on the dope". Jeez...

What we do all go through to stay healthy.

Another Southern Trait

2006-07-02T08:18:00.000-07:00

Ever notice -- when Southerners want to emphasize a thing, they repeat it?

Examples:

A shirt is not just white, it is white-white.

A couple of days off is a vacation, a week off with a great destination is a vacation-vacation.

Painfully childlike behavior from an adult is not just childish, it is juvenile, juvenile, juvenile.

Once I started to notice this, I heard it often. And, it never ceases to make me smile!

And all this time, I thought I was French...

2006-06-23T17:51:00.000-07:00

I sit in a corner, sipping a sudsy green beer, pondering the meaning of ancestry. A server brings a platter of crispy-fried potatoes. Life is good.

The thing about life -- it is full of surprises. (I know it's a cliche', but it works.)

Last weekend, I visited my long-lost first cousin. We had a blast reconnecting after years apart. No reason for the distance. No big family falling out. Just two folks with busy lives.

What he imparted about our family name has given me reason to celebrate. Turns out, I am from a long line of Irish folks -- not French as I had always been told. Seems, when the family immigrated to the good old U S of A, they capitalized one letter to make the name appear to be other than Irish. Suppose, it was a time when being Irish wasn't desirable.

Now, I understand a number of things. Why I never really cared for heavy French food, but couldn't pass up a spud. Why green is my favorite color. Why bagpipes make me cry. Why seeing pictures of the Irish countryside leave me with a strange homesickness.

So, I owe a pot o' gold to my Cuz. Love you, Mikey!

Hot Weather Forces Author to Edit

2006-05-28T14:41:00.000-07:00

All of you who have ever written anything know the appeal of line editing a manuscript. Me, I'd rather have my eyebrows waxed with molten lead than sit down to the necessary job.

The Hades-like heat that has already descended on North Florida. If I go outside for more than a few minutes, I sweat. And, no, I don't glow nicely or get a bit misty, or any of those lovely euphimisms. I was always told that Southern Ladies do not sweat. Well, let me tell you, this one does!

The alternative is sitting at the computer in the pleasant air-conditioned study, forcing myself to drink iced tea with a sprig of mint and edit. Alas.

How many more months until Fall?

Sigh.

My Purpose has been located!

2006-05-17T17:41:00.000-07:00

Today, I met with a group of dedicated women at A Woman's Place here in Tallahassee. This non-profit organization deals with a multitude of women's wellness issues -- you name it, and they are involved.

One of the women showed me the area where breast cancer patients are fitted with bras and prosthetics. I was truely amazed! As she described the joy of witnessing a woman feel whole again for the first time after surgery, tears gathered in her eyes. Another described the many ways the organization takes a woman from diagnosis, through surgery, and afterwards with loving concern, information, and comfort. I was honored to be in the presence of these health workers.

My third novel, Your Mama's Comfort Food, is due for release in the Fall of this year. The main character is a breast cancer patient. I plan to designate a portion of my royalties for this book to A Woman's Place. To start out, my contribution may be small in comparison to others. But, I dream large! Also, the Tallahassee Memorial Foundation has been gracious in agreeing to work with me to help proceeds from a book sale go to women's health issues here in the North Florida Big Bend area.

It is always possible to contribute to large charities. The money spreads out to those in need. But, with the help of my friends at Tallahassee Memorial Hospital, I will know that the money stays here in my city.

I did it! I did it! I actually did it!

2006-05-12T17:09:00.000-07:00

I feel like a kid again. Funny, how learning new junk can do that to a person.

My eyes are bloodshot. My brain is buzzing. I haven't eaten.

No, I'm not dragging in from an all-nighter.

I've been working on my website for several days -- learning by trial and error. Mostly error.

But, it's up and running. And, I think I'll go have a nice glas of Merlot to celebrate.

Check it out! www.rhettdevane.com

Be sure to sign the guest register -- it burned out several brain cells just putting it on the site.

I DID IT!!

2006-05-09T18:02:00.000-07:00

I surprise myself sometimes.

A week ago, when I first tore into my new software, I couldn't imagine I could actually design a website ( I call it that, loosely -- I did use a MS FrontPage template). And, to top it all off -- I still have half a brain left!

Check it out:
http://www.rhettdevane.com

One day, I will learn to design my own from scratch. For now, I am pleased as punch at plugging into the expert's format.

Book Three Well Underway!!

2006-05-01T04:56:00.000-07:00

Update on my third novel--

My phenomenal editor at Rabid Press is putting the final red-ink touches on my manuscript. Soon, I will be doing a little nip and tuck to fine-tune. Then, it's off to the typesetters.

No matter how many times this process unfolds, it is always a trip! I bless the universe for allowing me to send my writing out for others to read and, hopefully, enjoy.

Word is: Your Mama's Comfort Food will be released sometime in the fall -- either late October or November.

This is an important book, as I have big plans for it! I will be directing a portion of my proceeds to charity, and using the book to launch a new website for authors.

Details later....

Ig-Mo on Monday Morning

2006-05-01T04:44:00.000-07:00

I feel it is my just duty in this life to warn others of stooopid things I have done so that they might avoid the pitfalls.

Be advised: do not use body scrub with shea butter on your hair.

My first clue was when, after several minutes, I discovered I couldn't dry my wet hair, not even with a blow torch. Also, it had a kind of creepy texture.

So, I launched back into the shower to rewash and rewash and rewash. Still, I look a bit like I've pulled an all-weekender, camping without running water. Then, to avoid this issue in the future, I moved the similarly-shaped body wash bottle to another spot in the shower enclosure, far away from the shampoo and conditioner.

Bright side to all of this Monday, half-asleep, mayhem? The shea-buttered hair really holds a curl. And, I do believe this whole wet-hair thing is in.

:) peace.

The Muses Run Wild!

2006-04-23T07:33:00.000-07:00

My muses came back from a much-needed, well-deserved holiday. Where do they vacation, you think? Aruba? China? The Moon?

Anywho...

My third novel, slated for release in the late Fall -- "Your Mama's Comfort Food" -- has really gotten them stirred. Seems, I am to accomplish much with this novel.

The main character is a breast cancer patient, a prodigal daughter who returns home to face her medical challenges and the total mess she has made of her life.

I plan to designate a portion of what I make on this novel to breast cancer prevention/awareness/ treatment. But, the muses have other plans, as well.
To carry out their intentions, I must learn how to build and maintain a website.

So...if you see a large puff of smoke coming from North Florida, don't assume it's a brush fire. It will be my brain.

Love you all of you out there, especially ones who are facing health concerns.

Equal Parts Depression and Impression

2006-04-06T13:16:00.000-07:00

Just back in from the First Coast Writers' Festival in Jacksonville, Florida.

Had a marvelous time. Met all kinds of kindred spirits.

But, I have to say, these conferences always leave me a bit down as well as inspired. All the nay-sayers talk of how writers are up against unsurmountable odds, first to BE published, then to spread your work into the world. Seems there are many obstacles to those of us who come in through small, independent presses without benefit of famous relatives to jump-start our careers.

One thing about me. If you tell me how difficult something is -- how I will fall short -- I will hairlip Hades trying to make you wrong!

Hah! Take that!

Lamenting the return of Summer

2006-04-03T18:29:00.000-07:00

It was nearly ninety today. Heaven help us.

One thing about living in the South...you don't have to worry about any season -- other than summer -- lasting too long.

The humidity will start up soon, too. It's enough to take the curl from my hair. Funny, really, since it takes twenty minutes with a curling iron and a half of a can of ultra-hold spray to achieve such.

The six months of summer loom.

It's a beautiful day in the neighborhood!

2006-03-06T14:24:00.000-08:00

Good thing you can't reach out and slap someone over the Internet. I would deserve it for committing the ultimate sin -- sharing my news of Spring weather with my online chat writer-buddies.

It's been a balmy 70 to 80 degrees here in the panhandle of Florida. Sounds divine, eh?
I felt so much like a schmutz for announcing the fact to folks who shivered through a high in the thirties or, eek, teens.

Okay, all you people in the frigid climes...here is my official apology.

Let me also add --

In the middle of our 100% humidity, bug-infested, melt-your-mascara summer, you can take heart that you are sitting on the porch without a fan to stir the temperate air. Write me and brag about it. I promise not to grit my teeth.

Happy early Spring, anyway!!

Do you ever wonder?

2006-03-01T17:51:00.000-08:00

Do you ever wonder where all the nutty people come from? I've had one of those weeks where I have bumped into more than the normal share. Not just odd folks. Not just folks with different attitudes. No. These seem to be certifiable.

Now, I am one in favor of counseling and mental health. There are days when, yes, even I feel a bit off. But, at least, I am grounded on THIS PLANET.

Or, perhaps I am the nutty one and they really have a true grip on things. Hmmm....

Time -- she is a-flying

2006-02-01T17:34:00.000-08:00

Holy Cow. Here it is the first of February already. Now I know what my mom means by time passing by in such a blinding push.

The second book is plugging along. I am having a blast going to book club meetings and talking with the readers.

And, what about the Frey-cus? Hmm? At least, I label my books as fiction. :)
I'm sure what they say about even bad press at least being press is true.

I would rather do things the correct way, thank you. Even if it means I'm only outstanding in my own brain!!

Let the fun begin!!

2005-10-08T09:52:00.000-07:00

The book signings for Up the Devil's Belly have started! This is a picture of me and my sweet 88 year-old mother. She is my most faithful fan and promoter.

Fun in the Land of the Seminoles

2005-08-10T16:52:00.000-07:00

Just when I think I've heard enough people blathering on...

Here in Tallahassee, the recent stir over the FSU mascot, the Seminoles, has every sports enthusiast in a high rollin' boil. Seems the NCAA has decided the depiction is demeaning to the tribe, though their leaders have been okay with it for YEARS.

So...it put me to thinking. Dangerous, I realize. New mascot possibilities.

My vote goes to the FSU Rednecks. Travel with me, if you will, to the pre-kick-off hoopla. To the WHOO-EEE chant from the crowd, a beat-up wreck of a car comes roaring onto the field, slinging clots of grass in its exhaust-smoke wake. The car screeches to a halt, a six-pack of Bud is tossed into the middle of the field, then they roar off, sending the cheerleaders (dressed in Daisy Duke fashion) flying in every direction.
Rousing way to start a game? You dang straight.

New Novel Publication Date Set

2005-08-02T13:06:00.000-07:00

Well. Woo-hoo! My second southern fiction novel, "Up the Devil's Belly" is due for release by Rabid Press of Austin, Texas, on September 29th! This is the sequel to my first fiction novel, "The Madhatter's Guide to Chocolate" -- released in October of 2003.
The novels are listed on amazon.com & barnesandnoble.com and can be ordered through any book store.

Writing is a wonderous thing

2005-08-02T12:34:00.000-07:00

How insane must a person be to fancy writing? Mad as a hatter, from what I can tell.
I have been making up stories for as long as I can recall -- probably had an etch-a-sketch in utereo.

So, here I am. One published novel circulating in the world, one on the way. I can finally attend one of my high school reunions now.