I feel it is my just duty in this life to warn others of stooopid things I have done so that they might avoid the pitfalls.
Be advised: do not use body scrub with shea butter on your hair.
My first clue was when, after several minutes, I discovered I couldn't dry my wet hair, not even with a blow torch. Also, it had a kind of creepy texture.
So, I launched back into the shower to rewash and rewash and rewash. Still, I look a bit like I've pulled an all-weekender, camping without running water. Then, to avoid this issue in the future, I moved the similarly-shaped body wash bottle to another spot in the shower enclosure, far away from the shampoo and conditioner.
Bright side to all of this Monday, half-asleep, mayhem? The shea-buttered hair really holds a curl. And, I do believe this whole wet-hair thing is in.